It's really quite a journey to reach this place. Thursday I taught a sample class at my home studio. I first visualized this in 2008, September. That was the first time I really felt like I wanted to teach yoga. Yesterday that dream was filled for me.
Since I first imagined this day - I have had an open loop running in the background, knowing that I would eventually approach this day. I got word that I would teach the class 1 week ago. I traveled Monday and Tuesday this week. During travel I prepared a playlist, I sequenced - I imagined the scene. I fretted. I wondered who would come. I feared the worst - imagined the best. I got all up in my head!
Rolf teachers -- a little background to relate to -- Since December when I finished training I think I felt great to be free of the class narrative. I began experimenting, pulling things in from different styles and teachers. Finding my own personal expression. I was so fortunate to be able to teach at my workplace two days per week. I had a class of eager guinea pigs. They are non-judgmental, eager to learn and incredibly grateful. I am grateful for them.
In preparing for class I zigged and zagged. I zigged on music, zagged on sequence. I felt confused. In the end I went back to the source, back to Rolf's narrative, back to Rolf. I watched his 2.1 class on yogavibes. I soaked it up; saw how he had further refined what he was teaching; heard his reassuring voice. I went back to the well.
Guess what - it was the right thing to do. I got great evaluations! Glowing in some cases! Wonderful thank-yous and assurances from other teachers and students. It was a great day. I felt strong and confident. I commanded the room. I was my true self. Today I spoke to the studio director and she is looking for an opportunity to put me in her teacher rotation.
It's hard to write about this without sounding gloating. But really - I am just acknowledging my own hard work and growth. Even though I have been teaching twice a week since January, I can now say that I am a yoga teacher. I think the arc of my yoga story to date led to this climax - a moment of completion of a goal. A moment that marks a new beginning.
To my fellow Gates teachers -- we are so fortunate to have these days, these teachings, these experiences. The spirits of each of you and the group as a whole were my guidance. Rolf was at my side. What a gift!
Today I taught again at work. I breathed easier, I felt lighter - I slowed down - I took time to think. An open loop had been closed. More clock cycles were available. The Citta Vritti faded and the Purusa peeked through.
Open new chapter. Stay tuned.
Love is...
9 years ago